5

Volume 45, Issue 11 | June 29, 2026

RECEDING HARELINE

Run No.	Date	Hare Apparent	On On	Run Reporter
2399	13 July	In The Raw	The Waggon	Fish Fingers
2400	20 July	Thrillseeker	TBA	Growler
2401	27 July	Ted Bullpit	The Rice Shop, Lauderdale	Wee Bev
2402	3 August	Poledancer	2 Alroyn Crt, Rosetta	Next Week

** Run Reporters – if you are unable to attend, please organise to swap with another hasher **

UP AND CUMMING

• 6 July 2026 | Combined Clubs Charity Run @ RYCT
• 2 – 4 October 2026 H5 Oktoberfest @ Eastercoaster Resort, Orford
• 30 April – 2 May 2027 | Aussie Nash Hash 2027 | Adelaide

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RUN 2397 REPORT

• “Oh we’re from H5 hash” coming to you from Kingston Town Honey Bee Café
• This day had 6 minutes more daylight from the nadir of winter light.
• If you can’t see your name in bold letters you won’t read this dissertation or the paragraph (there aren’t any) it’s not in.
• Which means you can skip straight to the pretty pictures in which you might see yourself whether you like them or not. The photographer will always get your worst profile (Sods Law).

Honey Bee Café has had several reincarnations (brand names) and extending their opening hours to accommodate H5, was a good business plan and very lucrative for them. We’ve been here before and unlike Kingston RSL has much more untapped potential for trails. This trail was vaguely reminiscent of trails past but still worthy of commendation. It had a great variety of laneways, leafy glades (seen only in daylight of which we had an extra 6 minutes, as already stated), deepest darkest suburbia, overpasses and limited (cough) elevation of which some of our number struggle on. It was a dry evening and strangely quite unseasonably warm in some sections. Out across the car park onto Dennison St and down into Maranoa Rd to Channel Highway, the pack already stretched with some hashers looking for a shortcut after the underpass at macca’s. Directions were given to those less adventurous, and loops were cut out to enable back markers to hash a little to catch up. The gentle upslope following Whitewater Creekin the moonlight with the torch 500m ahead spurred me onwards to a bridgeway onto a dirt road and into Spring Farm village which was a sad reflection of the original rural Spring Farm property now long forgotten. Some lessons here for the girls and anyone interested #85. Stroke and massage all around your vaginal opening. Un your finger up and down over the moist cleft, gently opening it wider and wider. Pull the lips apart and caress the dripping skin just inside the opening. Many women find the wider their vaginal opening is stretched the more acute the sensations. Relish this feeling of vulnerable exposure. Maybe a map could be provided from strava so there would be no need to write these long-winded directions of where we have been. To continue, over the bypass bridge and down down to the new Coles store to another check which was located over Chanel Highway only to traverse a paddock to a laneway. More older suburban streets were traversed into Alfred’s Garden, across Redwood Rd to laneways leading b ack to Kingston Town shopping centre and Honey Bee. Its n ice to have a stroll around Kingston byways in the moonlight, the torch came in handy on occasions but a good walking trail of up to 5K if you got caught on checks or FTs. Not sure where the run went but suspect it was close to 8K. A lively lip session and good food was followed by the Chardy rendition of the H5 song. I won’t mention the comments of too long, too dark, too many hills, not enough variety of beers, longer than Sunday’s run and where are we next week. (Opps someone ‘s hash name got mentioned, sorry).

Spoof

With a cameo piece from “Unleashing the sex goddess in every woman”. Olivia St Clair. Batam Books #85

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SKOLS – Hash Lips Can’t Stop & Shit Creek

• The Hare(s) – Clearfell and Brazilian
• Wee Willie Winky – Had to work hard going uphill, almost needing a defibrillator
• Bee’s Dick – late again!
• Poledancer – operator error with his new smart watch – it stopped recording his run at 3km.

• MOP – alcohol abuse, was sent a video of her pouring a bottle of prosecco down the sink ($12 special)
• Grizzly – back at work this week – revenue raising to pay for his clothesline installment
• C*ntry Members – Power Pumper, Chuckie, JABA, Eager, Couple of Weeks
• Cracker and Eager – sat in adult seats instead of highchairs
• In The Raw – joined other hashers to watch Soceroos at Hanging Gardens. Got so pissed he couldn’t work out which bus to catch home
• Couple of Weeks – went on a shopping spree at Spring Farm whilst on the walk (bought some diarrhoea medication)
• Top Dek – parking in disabled car park

• Griz -> KKK and Eager – In The Raw calling trail and scared harriettes so they tried to get their own back but failed to surprise him.
• Can’t Stop -> Prickit for stealing Spoofs chips and left none for him
• Top Dek -> In The Raw taking photos on trail but went the wrong way
• JABA – for being another Andrew
• Arsecutter -> Cracker – used her phone on trail to organise drinks after hash because there was not stout at the venue.

Announcements

• Posh Hash – Friday night (3 July) starting at Mayfair Hotel
• Next Week’s run – Combined Hash Charity run at RYCT

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HASH FLASH

Link to all Photos from run 2397

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H5 MISMANAGEMENT 2026-27

Grand Master	In the Raw
Joint Masters	Clearfell Bee’s Dick
On Sec	Brazilian
Hash Cash	Rigor Mortis MOP
Hash Lips	Shit Creek Can’t Stop
Hash Hops	Arsecutter Lone Arranger
Trailmaster	Next Week
Hash Flash	Triple K
Hash Horn	Bad News
Hashet Managers	Viagra Next Week

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Contact us at hobart.h5@gmail.com