NEXT RUN | 9 June 2025 Run 2340 from New Sydney Hotel, 87 Bathurst St., Hobart Hare: Eveready Cost: $5 Buy own Meal & Drinks
RECEDING HARELINE
Run No.
Date
Hare Apparent
On On
2341
16 June
Rigor Mortis
Granada Hotel (Lounge Bar)
2342
23 June
In the Raw
Derwent Tavern, Bridgewater
2343
30 June
Arse Cutter
TBC
HARES NEEDED – SEEPRICKIT, BEFORE SHE SEES YOU!
KEEPING THE BASTARDS HONEST
Hares in 2025-26. Make sure that your name appears on this list at least once! (Twice if you’re a Co-Hare†)
Sir Eve
Growler
Sonar
Cant Stop
UP AND CUMMING Fri 10, Sat 11 & 12 October – Oktoberfest @ Tamar Valley Resort, Grindelwald – (details to come) 8-10 May 2026 | Interhash 2026, Yogyakarta, Indonesia
RUN 2339 REPORT
I love driving through town in Peak Hour to get to a Hash Run. Leave early I thought, lucky I did as I was stationary 2/3rds of the way down the Tasman Bridge. 15 minutes later at the bottom of Davey St. At least from here there was movement, albeit slow. I could enjoy listening to the radio and the beat of the wipers disposing of the water on the windscreen.
As we congregated, quick look at the menu, go to order and grab a beer – No! Not allowed to order, they would come and take the order. So go and grab a beer. I must say the renovations do look good, but it does make the sound very noisy. Eventually most has ordered and paid. 6.30 was here and were were regrouped outside, all in coats and some with brollys. Lone Arranger was quite miffed as hers had disappeared with the man that says it never rains on a Hash Run!
Cant Stop pointed at the trail markings and told us to go “That way”. 200 metres up the road and Triple K was on the phone to the Hare – Where the “F” does it go. Oh the Joys of Hashing in the Wet! Eventually we found it again, only to lose it again and again.
Secret: Apparently the trail went up the hidden pathway with the hidden trail markings that would have eventually taken us up and into Firthside.
Most found trail markings through the underpass near the Park and pathway that is used on the Park Runs.
Never to be outdone most of the walkers now followed the trail backwards calling out “No No” which did confuse the Hash Virgin “Jake” and Silent But Deadly. Quite clear when explained as we were going backwards On On becomes No No.
Some Hashers did their own thing. Stunned Mullet and French Tickler had made their way directly from the Hotel and down to the RSL for a drink stop. Only to be informed that it wasn’t the location of the Hash Venue tonight. Some old disheveled bearded Hasher had already been there, thinking it was the venue for tonight. Who could that be? Who gets lost? Begins with a “T”.
Some walkers made an effort to stay out on a walk for most of the hour. Not the best of nights for doing a Hash Trail. Need more markings in the wet and good torches.
Country Members:
Arriving back to the venue early at 7.25pm, I was aghast that the food was already coming out. Didn’t even get a chance to order a Beer. Hares: Can you please instruct the Venue that meals come out at least after 7.35. Give the stragglers a chance to get back and get a drink.
Eventually, we were all back, except for Thrillseeker. Arrived late, returned late. ordered a Chicken Mignon, got a Chicken Parmi. Who stole his order!
Finally the Lip Session started with lots of Down Downs and eventually we were allowed to go home.
On! On! Sir Eve
SKOLS – Stunned Mullet & Organ Grinder
The Hare: Cant Stop. What do we think of the run? Boooo!
Country Members: Clear Fell, Brazilian, Silent but Deadly, Jerk Off, Next Week, Highness Eager.
Hash Virgin:Jake or Jacob
Silent but Deadly: No Hash gear
Jerk Off: a couple of Jokes
Thrillseeker: arrived late @ 6.50pm from the Kingston RSL
Grizzly: Never rains on a Hash trail, stole Lone Arranger’s brolly
Stunned Mullet: got asked for ID at the Bar
Silent but Deadly: underage, but didn’t get asked for ID.
Lord Limp: Birthday last week
Skolls from the floor:
Stunned Mullet & French Tickler: went straight to the RSL from the start of the trail
Prawn Star: Fat boy, spilt the beer.
Grass Roots: from last week, couldn’t remember names – (Dish Licker, Organ Grinder, Just Kidding).
Grass Roots: nominated for “Educator of the Year”.
Spoof & Bees Dick:Long lost son finally finding his Father
Jake/Jacob: good priorities “actually his Father’s birthday today”.
Prawn Star on his motorcycle drew up to the traffic lights, a car screeched to a halt and In the Raw jumped out and ran up to him. “For goodness sake man, didn’t you realise your wife had fallen off when you took that sharp bend a mile back?” “Oh thanks, mate,” replied the Prawn Star. “For a moment I thought I’d gone deaf.”
Rigor Mortis was so desperate for a partner, she advertised for one in the local newspaper. The next day, she got over 500 replies from women saying, “You can have mine.”
The event made headline news in the local paper. “Man of 80 marries girl of 21.” The man was in such great demand that it was arranged for him to hold a press conference when they returned from their honeymoon. “How often do you have sex?” shouted out one of the journalists. “Nearly every night,” replied the man. “Nearly on Monday, nearly on Tuesday, nearly on Wednesday …”
Lord Limp visited a plastic surgeon with a badly damaged penis. “What happened to you?” asked the surgeon. “It’s like this,” said the Lord Limp, blushing madly. “I live on a caravan park next to this beautiful lady. And she really does turn me on. Each night, I watch her take a sausage from the fridge, stick it in a hole in the caravan floor and then she sits on it and does the business.” “So how did you get involved?” asked the surgeon. “Well doc, I thought a long time about this and decided it was such a waste. So one night, I crawled under the caravan, took the sausage away and substituted my dick.” “So what happened?” “Everything was going fine until there was a knock at her door. She jumped up and tried to kick the sausage under the table!”
Arse Cutter and Grass Roots were having difficulty surviving financially so they decided that the Grass Roots should try prostitution as an extra source of income. So Arse Cutter drove her out to a popular corner and informed her he would be at the side of the building if she had any questions or problems. As Spoof pulled up shortly after and asked her how much to go all the way. She told him to wait a minute and ran around the corner to ask Arse Cutter. Arse Cutter told her to tell Spoof $100. She went back and informed Spoof, at which he cried, “That is too much!” He then asked, “How much for a hand job?” She asked him to wait a minute and ran to ask Arse Cutter how much. Arse Cutter said, “Ask for $40.” Then Grass Roots ran back and informed Spoof. He felt that this was an agreeable price and began to remove his pants and underwear. Upon the removal of his clothing Grass Roots noticed that Spoof was really well hung. She asked him once more to wait a moment, then ran around the corner again. Arse Cutter asked, “Now what?” Grass Roots replied, “Can I borrow $60?”
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