Volume 43, Issue 45 | February 24, 2025

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RECEDING HARELINE

Run No.	Date	Hare Apparent	On On
2327	10 Mar	Mr Bean	29 Amanda Crescent, Sandy Bay Bring swim wear for the pool
2328	17 Mar	Limp	Legacy Park, Hobart Domain Irish Beer Wars
2329	24 Mar	Hare required
2330	31 Mar	Triple K	Lennox Park, Old Beach
2331	7 April	Hare required
2332	14 April	Hare required
2333	21 April	Hare required
2334	28 April	The JMs	AGPU Venue TBA

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UP AND CUMMING

15 March 2025 | Bream Creek Show Hash Run
28-30 March 2025 | Aussie Nash Hash 2025, Fremantle
8-10 May 2026 | Interhash 2026, Yogyakarta, Indonesia

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RUN 2325 REPORT

Around 40 Hashers turned up at the Snug house of Stunned Mullet’s grandad and grandma for Run 2325. The hares claimed run of the year (or maybe run of the week), and Prawn Star said he had the scars to prove it. But there were some mixed messages here, as the hares also claimed it was a cacophony of cock-ups (love the poetry!) which sort of strained the son/daddy relationship.

Trail set off toward Snug Tiers Rd and passed through the Snug cemetery, scene of a nefarious rose-stealing crime. ITR claimed innocence, but the evidence indicated certain guilt.

Trail then crossed the Channel Highway and continued along Beach Rd to the coast of North West Bay. Grizzly, proudly wearing his Over 100kg Club shirt, tried hiding from the paparazzi (aka ITR) behind a pole. When it became obvious that the width of Grizzly in his Over 100kg Club shirt was greater than the width of the pole, he gave up on this endeavour and tried racing ITR up the road. Ah, the trials and perils of the paparazzi!

Once we arrived at the coast, the runners’ trail took a detour across the bridge, while the walkers’ trail looped back toward the west and followed the Snug River Track. Contessa Coupla Weeks detoured with the runners to see whether the hares had dared to trespass on her very own private property without her very own permission. To her horror, they had transgressed. Searching for virgin territory for the greater good of H5, Stunned Mullet and Prawn Star got so excited that they forgot about a little thing like permission. Did this excuse wash with the Contessa? Oh, no! She had husband Hughie waiting to threaten trespassing Hashers with impending doom.

There was a Piss Stop along the river, with an impressive array of drinks, at the 2.7kms mark (or 3.8kms for the runners). Here, runners and walkers mingled, encouraged by Stunned Mullet: spend as long as you want drinking here, it’s a short trail. Last to arrive was Snack Bar, having run the furthest because he took a wrong turn, trying to beat Thrill Seeker in the game of getting lost on trail. From the Piss Stop, it was a short distance to the On On for all except Grizzly, who continued past the end and is rumoured to have done the trail again.

The Lip session started with a touch of chaos when Prawn Star called up Stunned Mullet for a birthday skol and then announced there was cake, leading to a general Hash feeding frenzy. When order was eventually restored, a marathon Lip session continued. The highlight was celebration of five Millstones, including a massive 1,900 runs for Sir Eve. GM Clearfell presented the first four badges with his trademark gentlemanly style. However … scratch the genteel veneer of our honourable GM and what do you find? Read on …

There was no style involved in delivery of Can’t Stop’s badge: this was celebrated with gusto and a general mess. ITR (with a little help from others) dumped on Can’t Stop’s head three cans of shaving cream, one litre of custard and two packets of cake sprinkles. I believe it’s called pay-back.

Most will blame ITR for the treatment handed to Can’t Stop. However … lurking behind the scene was the Machiavellian figure of Clearfell. With a few well-chosen whispers in the ear of ITR (not the sharpest chisel in the toolbox), Clearfell engineered the spectacle he desired without tarnishing his own squeaky-clean image. He should have been a politician, really!

On On – Cracker

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SKOLS

• Stunned Mullet: happy birthday far queue
• Stunned Mullet and Prawn Star: hares
• Brazilian, Clearfell, Jerk Off, French Tickler, Arse Bandit, E Route, Contessa Coupla Weeks: c#ntry members
• Monsoon Drain, Bus Stop: visitors from Scotland
• ITR: stole a rose from the graveyard, tried to present it to Snack Bar
• ITR: posing as an unlikely siren on trail
• ITR: lost property: left his jacked in the donations area, shivered through the Lip session
• Arsecutter, Grassroots, TopDek: at a concert, the Harriettes stayed glued to their seats and worked Arsecutter to the bone fetching their drinks
• Lone Arranger: enjoying her new car
• Pole Dancer: tried to pay Hash Cash with his Medicare card: practicing to join the NDIS brigade
• Jerk Off: cooked the f#ck out of his hamburger
• Jerk Off: his bandaged hand is evidence of a w#nking champion: was it worth it?
• Jerk Off: told a joke (they don’t ever get any better)
• Cracker: no Hash gear at a Cancer Council Tas event
• Prickit: retired
• Sir Eve: lost property: prophylactics
• Mr Bean: forgot Miss Bling’s Hash name
• Dishlicker: received the FRB shirt from Mr Bean
• Gov’nor Honkers: harassing the Muckery with tirades around cops not doing enough about e-scooters
• Stunned Mullet’s grandad: thanks for a great Hash venue
• Mr Bean, Brazilian: happy birthday far queue
• Stunned Mullet, Prawn Star (from Contessa Coupla Weeks): set trail across private property without permission
• Arsecutter (from ITR): finally returned ITR’s jacket
• Stunned Mullet: MILLSTONE: 75 runs
• E Route: MILLSTONE: 125 runs
• Wee Willie Winkie: MILLSTONE: 150 runs
• Can’t Stop: MILLSTONE: 700 runs
• Sir Eve: MILLSTONE: 1,900 runs (who needs to get a life?)

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A Combined Hash Run will be held on the occasion of the 124th Bream Creek Show

** ENJOY A HASH RUN FROM THE SHOWGROUNDS **

DATE: Saturday, 15th March 2025

VENUE: Bream Creek Showgrounds, Copping

START TIME: Run starts at 11:00 am
It is a bus run. Bus will be parked on Marion Bay Road (near Townsend Lane) above the main car park at the Showgrounds

HARES: Moses (Dumb); Argue (Dumber) & Grasshopper (Dumbless)

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HASH FLASH

Link to all photos for Run 2325

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H5 MISMANAGEMENT 2024-25

Grand Master	Clearfell
Joint Masters	Bad News In The Raw
On Sec	Cracker
Hash Cash	Rigor Mortis TopDek
Hash Lips	Bee’s Dick Prawn Star
Hash Hops Assistant Hops	Thrill Seeker Ratu Steady Eddie
Trailmaster	Lord Limp
Hash Flash	Pole Dancer
Hash Horn	Big Mac Quarter Pounder
Hashet Managers	Viagra Next Week

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Contact us at hobart.h5@gmail.com

Website https://hobarthash.tripod.com/h5/