Volume 43, Issue 3 | May 6, 2024

RECEDING HARELINE

Run No.	Date	Hare Apparent	On On
2282	20 May	Incoming	Bellerive Yacht Club for Steady’s 1,000th. extravaganza
2283	27 May	Eager	Paddy Wagon
2284	3 June	Growler	Claremont Bowls Club

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UP AND CUMMING

24 June 2024 | Combined Clubs Charity Run in support of Gynaecological Cancer Research
28-30 March 2025 | Aussie Nash Hash 2025, Fremantle
8-10 May 2026 | Interhash 2026, Yogyakarta, Indonesia

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Run Report

New Trailmaster Lord Limp went to the Receding Hareline moneybox and found it empty, so volunteered himself to set this second trail of the new Hash year. It’s good to see that there are now a few volunteers under Receding Hareline. You really do want to see Sir Limp before he sees you – on hearing the words. ‘I can’t set a trail’, he morphs into Scary Hasher, someone you wouldn’t want to meet in a dark alley on a dark night. Although on reflection, Sir Limp at his best is still someone you wouldn’t want to meet in a dark alley on a dark night.

Hashers gathered behind the Flannelette Curtain at the Moonah Hotel, described as an art deco Spanish revival pub. It was built in 1934 and has since been through many changes and names (most recently the Mustard Pot), then sat empty for a while before becoming the new Moonah Hotel three years ago. The pub is even older than Steady Eddie, although I’m sure this won’t stop Steady from regaling you with stories about it if you have an hour or two to spare.

Neither half of Hash Cash was in attendance, so Hasher-of-all-Trades Grizzly was once again wielding the little white square. The pub was bursting at the seams, with a quiz night happening as well as H5. The quiz master was heard to exclaim, as we set off on Trail, ‘They’re all leaving – hope there isn’t a fire!’. Trail started along the railway line bike track, then followed various streets and hidden lane ways into New Town before looping back again to Moonah.

Quarter Pounder abandoned his running companions to hobble along with the walkers, claiming to have injured himself at last week’s Hash run. There was no horn in sight, Quarter Pounder asking whether it was really the Hash Horn’s duty to carry the horn on Trail every week. Of course, every Hasher knows that the answer is ‘Yes’, so Good JM Bad News, claiming to be something of a horn expert, offered to give a free lesson in the ancient art of horn blowing:

• Step 1: Carry the horn.
• Step 2: Lift the horn to mouth.
• Step 3: Blow the horn.

Really, Quarter Pounder and Big Mac, how difficult can it be?

Crossing the New Town Rivulet prompted a call from ITR that there were trolls under those bridges. In fact, the only troll was Bad JM ITR stomping over the bridges and declaring to all who didn’t want to listen that ultimate power was his and he would soon be issuing edicts. Good luck with that!

There seems to be a worrying bid for the NDIS brigade to take over the world. NDIS President-for-Life C#nt Stop found the perfect chair on Trail for a little sit-down and then decided it was also a perfect spot from which to convene a meeting of the NDIS faithful. His speeches must have had some impact because, in the final stretch of Trail along Main Road, C#nt Stop was seen ambling along in front of a pack of so-called runners, including Magic Touch and Stunned Mullet. Back at the pub, a few athletes such as TicToc and Prawn Star started running back along trail, probably seeking the runners who had absconded to the NDIS crowd. Clear signs that H5 is descending into anarchy and chaos, if you ask me.

Lord Limp was really kind in his trail setting (or else he’s secretly planning to abscond to the NDIS brigade). The walkers’ trail measured 4.2kms. with scarcely a hill in sight; the runners’ trail was reputed to be about 6.5kms.

On On seating was at a premium with a big Hash crowd of over 40. A mild night and good venue were obviously drawcards (and, of course, the promise of a Lord Limp trail). Hash Flash, Pole Dancer, had lifted his game and was dancing his camera in all directions, looking as if he knew what he was doing. Both Lips, Bee’s Dick and Prawn Star, were in attendance and kept us well entertained with a medley of Fake News that Hashers call skolls.

On! On! – Cracker

SKOLS

• Lord Limp – Hare
• Half a Pounder – proxy skol for TicToc – long story about a pissed kiss
• Sir Eve – unfairly labelled a turncoat for complementing last week’s Trash
• Prawn Star and Stunned Mullet – centerfold boys of the Kingborough Chronicle, no Hash gear in sight
• Stunned Mullet – claimed to be looking after the NDIS brigade but pushed them all out of the way to claim the warmest seat next to fire
• Big Mac, Quarter Pounder and Viagra – no horns on trail
• Thrillseeker (Wha?) – working on Atomic Clock time, confused everyone by arriving early
• Thrillseeker, Cracker and Growler – Thrilly thought Cracker and Growler were twins – needs to go the Specsavers.
• Grassroots – no idea, something to do with glue
• Steady and Cracker – Steady would like Cracker to be a stripper in a cupcake for his 1,000th. run (nah, not gonna happen)
• ITR – told Rotten that smoking would stop her boobs from growing
• Magic Touch – exposed at work
• Pricket – wearing an Oktoberfest shirt, obviously confused
• Pricket – arrived home too pissed to take off her boots
• LA – Loaned her torch thinking it didn’t need batteries because it had a USB
• Bad News and Sir Eve – no working torches

Steady’s down down song

Sung to the tune of My Old Man’s a Dust Man – sing LOUD, sing OFTEN:

Oh, good old Steady Eddie,
He always wears a hat.
He sticks his hand upon his hip
And he dislocates his back.

Oh, when he wears a beret
He looks just like a clown.
He’s always doing something wrong
And he has to drink it down, down, down, down

HASH FLASH

Link to all photos for Run 2280

ALL NEW! H5 MISMANAGEMENT 2024-25

Grand Master	Clearfell
Joint Masters	Bad News In The Raw
On Sec	Cracker
Hash Cash	Rigor Mortis TopDek
Hash Lips	Bee’s Dick Prawn Star
Hash Hops Assistant Hops	Thrill Seeker Steady Eddie
Trailmaster	Lord Limp
Hash Flash	Pole Dancer
Hash Horn	Big Mac Quarter Pounder
Hashet Managers	Viagra Next Week

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Website https://hobarthash.tripod.com/h5/